The Dawn Treader

The whole union life concept has completely gripped my thinking.  I am seeing union life everywhere now.  In sermons, books, blogs, songs ... and in prayer letters.

One of the missionaries we support is a friend from Covenant College.  Last year, he left Covenant College for Ireland ... in his 60's ... yes, he became a missionary in his sixties.  He writes the most amazing prayer emails I have ever read ... because he is entering into a deeper union life with Christ.  It is wonderful to have a front row seat to see a life transformed into the image of Christ.

In his latest email, he writes,

"When I was in my 20’s I was certain that God wanted to use me to change the world. By my 30’s the boundaries had shrunk a bit and I thought it would be okay if it was just Covenant College. Somewhere in the 40’s it seemed it might be only my own academic department or maybe the church to which I belonged. The 50’s? Well, perhaps a class of students or a few people with whom I had become close in the church would do.

My life has been full of basically worthy desires and dreams, most of which never materialized. And now that I am in the 60’s I am not at all sure that being used to change something is what matters most. My heart is not so determined to “make things happen” these days. I am more content to let what happens be a by-product rather than the goal.

Am I just getting tired? Cynical? Have I lost sight of God’s calling? Perhaps. Does making a difference still matter? Of course. But maybe God is growing me also, and drawing me to himself in ways I have not previously known when I was so bent on accomplishing something important.

At the end of Moses’ life God speaks of the wonders he has done through Moses, but he also says something that may reveal what mattered most to Moses as his earthly journey ended.

I became aware of this several weeks ago through reading an article by Larry Crabb in Conversations, a semi-annual journal that is a forum for encouraging spiritual transformation. What grabbed me was a question Larry raised about when you would prefer to have had Moses as your spiritual guide—when he was 40, headstrong with confidence killing the Egyptian; at 80, when arrogance had yielded to felt weakness; or at 120, when he was sitting on a hilltop gazing at the land to which he had struggled to bring God’s people but which he could not enter? Larry’s choice was 120 because he thinks that is when Moses knew God best. Hmmm.

Read the story of the end of Moses’ life in Deut. 31—34 for more details, but here is the scene. God tells Moses the time has come for him to die, though he is still in good health. He also tells him that after he is gone the people will rebel in such despicable ways that he will abandon them and hide his face from them. Then he sends Moses to the mountain to look out over the Promised Land and reminds him for the second time that his blowing it with the stick and the rock will keep him from entering the land himself. Moses then dies, still with good eyesight and a strong step, and God takes him off to bury him in a place where no one will know where he is.

Moses could have seriously been saying to God, “What has been the point of all this? You are the one who chose me to lead these people out of Egypt, I have given my life for them, I have instructed them just as you have said I should, I have been patient for 40 years of wandering, I finally have them here; and now you remind me that my one mess-up keeps me from going into the land, and then tell me they are going to turn away from all that I have taught them after I die. All that I did at your instruction was for naught? Is this a cruel joke? Why did I bother?

But there is no indication of that kind of response. Moses appears to be quiet and content. How? Perhaps because Moses understands all his accomplishments and failures in a whole different light by this time. At 120 Moses had become the one who knew God face to face (ch 34 v 10), the reality that now defined who he was and in what he could rest. It seems that mattered most."

K A  -  B O O M.

His prayer letter smacked me right between the eyes.

Because I see myself the way my friend saw himself in his 20's, 30's, 40's and 50's ... and the way Moses probably viewed himself at 80.  I am headstrong with confidence.  I am ready to change the world for Christ.  And God continues to humble me -- year after year.  Lower and lower.  As my dreams of changing the world begin to fade from the world, down to the church, down to a few blog readers ... down to at this point, maybe my four children if that ... this email speaks volumes to my heart.

What really matters in life?  Is it what you accomplish for Christ?  Is it influencing worldviews?  Discipling others?  Leading others to Christ?  Fighting for causes?  Taking a bold stand for justice and mercy?  Teaching worldview thinking?  Writing thought provoking blog posts that draw kudos, trackbacks and links?

While all of those are good things, what really matters is knowing the risen Christ.  In short, intimacy with God.

"At 120 Moses had become the one who knew God face to face (ch 34 v 10), the reality that now defined who he was and in what he could rest."

What defines you?  What do you put in your "about me"?  What do you put on your MySpace?

What would the apostle Paul write?  We get a glimpse in Phil 1:21.  Paul ... the one whose life was Christ.  What would Moses write?  The one who knew God face to face.

Ultimately, all that matters is our union with Christ and our intimacy with God.  Guess what.  As we walk in deeper union with Christ, ministry happens.  It can't not happen.  As those around encounter the living Christ in you, they will be affected.  Jesus Christ simply has that effect on people.

To come full circle ... Ministry flows from being.

Here is the bottom line : focus on being.